It’s the taboo subject that nobody wants to talk about, though we’ve all thought it, heard it and said it. “Wow, he has really lost weight” or “She would be so pretty, if only she lost that weight.” Commercial after commercial advertising this diet and that diet, “just drink this every day and you will be beautiful,” or “take this magic pill and you will look like all the models in the magazines.” The pressure to be a certain size or look a certain way can be overwhelming, especially to those with anxiety and low self-esteem.
When someone mentions the words “eating disorder,”
what do you envision? Chances are the picture that pops in your head is of a young, thin girl, or perhaps an adult who is “just too skinny” or “needs some meat on her bones.”
Would it surprise you to learn that approximately one in three people struggling with an eating disorder is male? In fact, according to the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA), subclinical eating disordered behavior, such as binge eating, purging, laxative abuse and fasting, are nearly as common among men as they are among women. Would you believe that someone categorized as overweight or even obese may be suffering from an eating disorder like bulimia? The fact is, there isn’t a “one-size-fits-all” description when dealing with eating disorders. It can strike anyone, any family, at any time.
With traditional calendar schools starting soon, many Apex families may find themselves in a position of dealing with a child that has developed or continues to struggle with an eating disorder. Eating disorders can be caused by a complex combination of genetic, biological, behavioral, psychological and social factors. The start of school, while exciting for many, can be cause for stress and anxiety in many children and young adults. New classes, new friends, and in some cases a new city or state, can be more than some young people can process.
What is an Eating Disorder?
To become educated, it is important to start at the beginning. So, what is an eating disorder? According to the National Institute of Health, eating disorders are serious illnesses that cause severe disturbances to a person’s eating behaviors. But not all eating disorders are created equal. There are several types of disorders that show themselves in different ways. Some of the common eating disorders include anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa and binge-eating disorder. Each of these disorders comes with its own complex set of symptoms, triggers and risks. Each one can take a devastating toll on a person’s mind, body and spirit, and thankfully, each one can be treated.
People that suffer from anorexia nervosa may perceive themselves as overweight, even when they are often severely underweight. Anorexia nervosa is characterized by weight loss, or difficulty maintaining an appropriate body weight for height, age and stature. Those with anorexia nervosa typically are extremely restrictive of their daily calorie intake. There is a fear that if they consume too many calories they will gain weight.
In
addition, in their quest for the “perfect weight,” many with this disorder exercise compulsively. Keep in mind that this goes beyond exercising daily to stay fit or relieve stress. Exercising through illness or injury, excessive guilt about missing a day of exercise, exercising in secret or unsafe conditions, and putting an obsessive amount of focus on how many calories being burned are all symptoms of anorexia nervosa.
Unlike anorexia nervosa, those suffering from bulimia nervosa have recurrent and frequent episodes of eating unusually large amounts of food, followed by compensating behavior such as vomiting, excessive use of laxatives or diuretics and fasting. Where those with anorexia nervosa are typically underweight, many with bulimia nervosa are often able to maintain a “healthy” weight, making it that much more difficult to detect.
Those that suffer from binge-eating disorders are the ones that don’t fit the mold of someone with an eating disorder. They are often overweight or obese, and therefore are seen as “fat” or someone who just eats too much. The truth is, binge-eating disorder is the most common disorder in the U.S. Binge-eating, like any other eating disorder, is an illness. It is a loss of control over eating and something that is just as severe as any other eating disorder.
Not my child
No parent wants to think about the possibility of their child developing an eating disorder. It is not on the usual radar of things parents look for. One Apex family has learned first-hand that even the most seemingly well-adjusted child can suffer from an eating disorder. (Because of the sensitivity of the matter, the family’s names will not be used). How can an intelligent, caring, responsible and beautiful young woman who seems to have everything going for her see herself as anything other than perfect? Her parents, of course, saw nothing but the good. Her loving heart and her smile that lights up a room. But what they didn’t realize was that their baby girl was starving herself to the point that she was passing out.
Her parents became aware of what was going on and immediately took her to get help. Like any parents, her mom and dad felt a wide range of emotions, including guilt, anger, and fear. Guilt because her mom felt that perhaps the focus she put on her own weight had an adverse impact on her daughter. Anger because this wasn’t supposed to happen and they couldn’t make it better. Fear because the future for their daughter, which was always bright with possibilities, was now uncertain. The truth is that there is very little that these doting parents could have done to stop this vicious illness from taking over their little girl. What matters now is that she knows that she is loved no matter what, and they are getting the treatment they need to be able to move forward as a family.
Be Aware
Be aware of the warning signs. The sooner an eating disorder is recognized the better. According to ANRED.com (Anorexia And Related Eating Disorders), some signs to look out for if you think your child may be suffering from an eating disorder are:
Unusual Food Behaviors: skipping meals, eating in ritualistic ways, not eating in front of others, gorging, cleaning out cupboards or refrigerators, eating in secret
Appearance or Body Image Changes: losing or trying to lose weight, frantic fears of gaining weight or obesity, complaining about being overweight even when they are not, wearing baggy clothing, often in layers to hide weight loss or to stay warm
Exercise Behaviors: exercises excessively
Feelings: has difficulty expressing feelings, especially anger or denies anger, feelings of inadequacy, tantrums or overreactions
Keep in mind that these symptoms may also be a sign of other medical conditions. If you suspect an eating disorder, contact your child’s physician immediately in order to get a proper diagnosis.
Talk
The taboo subject that nobody wants to talk about is usually the one that needs to be discussed the most. As parents it is important to know the facts and learn the warning signs. Understand that there isn’t a “type” that develops an eating disorder. There isn’t an age where you can let your guard down. Children as young as 9 or 10 can suffer from eating disorders. Most important, know that it isn’t anyone’s “fault.” Just like asthma or allergies, eating disorders are illnesses that require treatment, not judgment. There is help available, and there are people that can lead you to the light at the end of the tunnel. Reach out for them and know that you are not alone.
